








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 482 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 256 matches | ||
| Faceit | 170 matches | ||
| Wingman | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 47 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




17 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6074 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 19,792 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4519 | 23% |
| Smokes | 6250 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 3410 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 5613 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,722,195 of utility $138 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 383 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Collynzen | 63% | 38 |
| #2 | Dasher | 61% | 114 |
| #3 | ai | 60% | 146 |
| #4 | Decadenza | 59% | 80 |
| #5 | #Huba12 <[^--^]> | 59% | 87 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | Frostelele | 55% | 71 |
| #9 | Eve | 54% | 114 |
| #10 | ixpyy | 54% | 138 |
| #11 | lace | 54% | 50 |
| #12 | Putrik | 52% | 62 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Eve | 15 | 0.0062 |
| #2 | SilLeX | 5 | 0.0016 |
| #3 | ai | 4 | 0.0014 |
| #4 | Yuzu | 4 | 0.0016 |
| #5 | ixpyy | 3 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dasher | 604 | 0.26 | 19 min |
| #2 | ai | 394 | 0.14 | 11 min |
| #3 | Eve | 333 | 0.14 | 9 min |
| #4 | SilLeX | 312 | 0.10 | 7 min |
| #5 | #Huba12 <[^--^]> | 290 | 0.17 | 9 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dasher | +4.29 | 89 | 82 |
| #2 | ai | +1.63 | 84 | 68 |
| #3 | Fuwa #SlavaUkraini | +1.55 | 68 | 64 |
| #4 | Decadenza | +1.30 | 87 | 69 |
| #5 | Yuzu | +0.66 | 81 | 67 |





