








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 659 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 315 matches | ||
| Faceit | 121 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 75 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 34 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




57 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8030 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 30,343 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 10511 | 35% |
| Smokes | 7941 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 5623 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 6268 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $976,603 of utility $64 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 721 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Astro | 70% | 165 |
| #2 | Frankfurda | 68% | 112 |
| #3 | nate | 68% | 102 |
| #4 | ♡✧ lunar ✧♡ | 62% | 154 |
| #5 | jean | 60% | 53 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | PP-Bizon | 58% | 62 |
| #9 | AnOn | 57% | 49 |
| #10 | JediJoe2001 | 57% | 37 |
| #11 | Rockin' & Rollin' | 55% | 242 |
| #12 | SexyAssBakedPotato | 52% | 46 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Astro | 30 | 0.0092 |
| #2 | Rockin' & Rollin' | 24 | 0.0047 |
| #3 | ♡✧ lunar ✧♡ | 14 | 0.0046 |
| #4 | Frankfurda | 10 | 0.0045 |
| #5 | SexyAssBakedPotato | 8 | 0.0086 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Frankfurda | 676 | 0.30 | 17 min |
| #2 | Astro | 565 | 0.17 | 13 min |
| #3 | ♡✧ lunar ✧♡ | 342 | 0.11 | 8 min |
| #4 | nate | 290 | 0.14 | 6 min |
| #5 | jean | 253 | 0.24 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jean | +3.65 | 81 | 72 |
| #2 | Astro | +3.05 | 91 | 60 |
| #3 | Dreg | +2.43 | 77 | 66 |
| #4 | nate | +1.66 | 84 | 47 |
| #5 | Frankfurda | +1.41 | 74 | 81 |





