








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 292 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 233 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 72 matches | ||
| Faceit | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 22 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




40 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3964 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,206 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2460 | 22% |
| Smokes | 2905 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 2989 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 2852 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,167,683 of utility $107 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 699 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PP-Bizon | 59% | 54 |
| #2 | jean | 57% | 40 |
| #3 | Sometimes Spray? | 57% | 67 |
| #4 | Dreg | 55% | 242 |
| #5 | Spyro | 55% | 49 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Spyro | 55% | 49 |
| #6 | UncannyPlayer12 | 54% | 149 |
| #7 | JustAPlayer | 52% | 56 |
| #8 | JediJoe2001 | 50% | 50 |
| #9 | GATS | 34% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dreg | 24 | 0.0047 |
| #2 | UncannyPlayer12 | 11 | 0.0036 |
| #3 | Spyro | 5 | 0.0051 |
| #4 | JustAPlayer | 4 | 0.0035 |
| #5 | jean | 4 | 0.0048 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dreg | 1440 | 0.28 | 38 min |
| #2 | Spyro | 293 | 0.30 | 8 min |
| #3 | JustAPlayer | 220 | 0.19 | 5 min |
| #4 | jean | 194 | 0.23 | 5 min |
| #5 | UncannyPlayer12 | 176 | 0.06 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Spyro | +4.46 | 82 | 74 |
| #2 | jean | +3.11 | 85 | 67 |
| #3 | Dreg | +2.87 | 78 | 68 |
| #4 | JustAPlayer | +0.72 | 84 | 61 |
| #5 | Rockin' & Rollin' | +0.67 | 61 | 54 |





