








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2214 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 536 matches | ||
| Faceit | 144 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 65 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 17 matches | ||
| Wingman | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 22 different maps





Our logs show 36 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




88 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
11865 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 28,178 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7500 | 27% |
| Smokes | 7317 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 6485 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 6876 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,329,487 of utility $125 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 745 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Venox | 57% | 207 |
| #2 | Hackbraten | 56% | 100 |
| #3 | Gtx_Hamster | 54% | 156 |
| #4 | Noah | 54% | 155 |
| #5 | Silence | 53% | 329 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Gtx_Hamster | 54% | 156 |
| #4 | Noah | 54% | 155 |
| #5 | Silence | 53% | 329 |
| #6 | Fabulous HUDSON HORNET | 49% | 128 |
| #7 | Noshian | 47% | 238 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Noshian | 53 | 0.0111 |
| #2 | Venox | 40 | 0.0094 |
| #3 | Silence | 31 | 0.0045 |
| #4 | Fabulous HUDSON HORNET | 23 | 0.0087 |
| #5 | Gtx_Hamster | 20 | 0.0063 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Silence | 685 | 0.10 | 18 min |
| #2 | Venox | 527 | 0.12 | 13 min |
| #3 | Noah | 517 | 0.16 | 12 min |
| #4 | Noshian | 505 | 0.11 | 11 min |
| #5 | Hackbraten | 283 | 0.14 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FRE3ZER | +3.43 | 89 | 59 |
| #2 | Silence | +2.35 | 91 | 53 |
| #3 | Venox | -0.59 | 67 | 58 |
| #4 | Gtx_Hamster | -1.12 | 65 | 43 |
| #5 | Noah | -1.65 | 65 | 65 |





