








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 515 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 492 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 58 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 36 matches | ||
| Faceit | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 34 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




100 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5754 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,750 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1483 | 11% |
| Smokes | 2879 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 6604 | 48% |
| Molotovs | 2784 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,088,273 of utility $215 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 576 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FRE3ZER | 54% | 156 |
| #2 | MRVN2302 | 54% | 46 |
| #3 | Silence | 50% | 50 |
| #4 | a niffo | 50% | 50 |
| #5 | Noshian | 50% | 248 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Noshian | 50% | 248 |
| #6 | Venox | 45% | 160 |
| #7 | Hackbraten | 43% | 132 |
| #8 | triebtäteR | 42% | 67 |
| #9 | Fabulous HUDSON HORNET | 39% | 145 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Noshian | 66 | 0.0126 |
| #2 | Venox | 32 | 0.0095 |
| #3 | Hackbraten | 30 | 0.0104 |
| #4 | Fabulous HUDSON HORNET | 28 | 0.0091 |
| #5 | FRE3ZER | 19 | 0.0061 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FRE3ZER | 582 | 0.19 | 15 min |
| #2 | Noshian | 548 | 0.10 | 13 min |
| #3 | Hackbraten | 408 | 0.14 | 11 min |
| #4 | Venox | 404 | 0.12 | 11 min |
| #5 | Fabulous HUDSON HORNET | 241 | 0.08 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FRE3ZER | +4.69 | 90 | 55 |
| #2 | Silence | +2.78 | 94 | 58 |
| #3 | Venox | +1.40 | 70 | 60 |
| #4 | MRVN2302 | +1.16 | 66 | 63 |
| #5 | Gtx_Hamster | +0.05 | 69 | 39 |





