








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1201 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 560 matches | ||
| Premier | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 24 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




76 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7892 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 23,110 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4263 | 18% |
| Smokes | 5987 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 6711 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 6149 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,858,597 of utility $184 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1320 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tuhnu | 67% | 39 |
| #2 | Lapatti | 62% | 53 |
| #3 | reima | 52% | 244 |
| #4 | cHii$ma | 51% | 419 |
| #5 | Smuli_Yöpyöriset | 50% | 583 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Smuli_Yöpyöriset | 50% | 583 |
| #6 | MUSTA JORI | 50% | 377 |
| #7 | nipa:D | 49% | 438 |
| #8 | Peräkoira | 48% | 106 |
| #9 | Termis2 | 48% | 319 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nipa:D | 26 | 0.0027 |
| #2 | Termis2 | 26 | 0.0037 |
| #3 | Peräkoira | 17 | 0.0080 |
| #4 | Smuli_Yöpyöriset | 16 | 0.0012 |
| #5 | reima | 8 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Smuli_Yöpyöriset | 1567 | 0.12 | 38 min |
| #2 | nipa:D | 932 | 0.10 | 26 min |
| #3 | MUSTA JORI | 664 | 0.08 | 18 min |
| #4 | cHii$ma | 634 | 0.07 | 18 min |
| #5 | Termis2 | 599 | 0.09 | 15 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tuhnu | +2.45 | 85 | 56 |
| #2 | cHii$ma | +2.03 | 78 | 64 |
| #3 | Lapatti | +1.26 | 78 | 70 |
| #4 | nipa:D | +0.98 | 68 | 70 |
| #5 | reima | +0.81 | 83 | 56 |





