








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 266 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 131 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 39 matches | ||
| Faceit | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 13 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 12 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




42 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4949 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,124 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1936 | 19% |
| Smokes | 2217 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 3347 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 2624 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,710,586 of utility $175 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 530 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | infinity ☾ | 54% | 191 |
| #2 | breezyMS | 52% | 58 |
| #3 | Chad Ryan | 52% | 266 |
| #4 | Beans, gentlemen | 51% | 189 |
| #5 | RGriffer | 49% | 125 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | breezyMS | 12 | 0.0110 |
| #2 | Chad Ryan | 9 | 0.0017 |
| #3 | Slink | 8 | 0.0049 |
| #4 | infinity ☾ | 7 | 0.0018 |
| #5 | Beans, gentlemen | 6 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chad Ryan | 896 | 0.17 | 25 min |
| #2 | Yung Tax Evasion | 577 | 0.19 | 15 min |
| #3 | RGriffer | 459 | 0.19 | 15 min |
| #4 | Beans, gentlemen | 396 | 0.10 | 11 min |
| #5 | infinity ☾ | 225 | 0.06 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chad Ryan | +2.95 | 80 | 64 |
| #2 | breezyMS | +2.92 | 66 | 54 |
| #3 | Maevvy | +0.83 | 72 | 48 |
| #4 | RGriffer | -0.43 | 68 | 67 |
| #5 | infinity ☾ | -0.44 | 52 | 45 |





