








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 361 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2659 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,911 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2353 | 34% |
| Smokes | 1703 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 1147 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 1708 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,098,808 of utility $225 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 70 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Real Dan Cooper 1971 | 56% | 154 |
| #2 | MJL1BS | 54% | 76 |
| #3 | RushedOrange333 | 53% | 79 |
| #4 | rubaiyacht | 52% | 65 |
| #5 | LilKonky4405 | 52% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | engineer.shark2006 | 51% | 45 |
| #7 | ArmoredFarmer1993 | 51% | 106 |
| #8 | SaltedCream™ | 50% | 26 |
| #9 | DukeWish | 47% | 189 |
| #10 | AquaticGolem | 33% | 12 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DukeWish | 18 | 0.0046 |
| #2 | RushedOrange333 | 15 | 0.0094 |
| #3 | rubaiyacht | 14 | 0.0105 |
| #4 | Real Dan Cooper 1971 | 6 | 0.0019 |
| #5 | ArmoredFarmer1993 | 5 | 0.0023 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DukeWish | 622 | 0.16 | 13 min |
| #2 | Real Dan Cooper 1971 | 316 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| #3 | rubaiyacht | 170 | 0.13 | 4 min |
| #4 | RushedOrange333 | 158 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #5 | ArmoredFarmer1993 | 146 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | rubaiyacht | +3.65 | 75 | 56 |
| #2 | Quinnjo | +2.64 | 57 | 65 |
| #3 | RushedOrange333 | +0.75 | 58 | 51 |
| #4 | DukeWish | -0.01 | 49 | 57 |
| #5 | Real Dan Cooper 1971 | -1.10 | 42 | 49 |





