








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 378 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 433 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 76 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




20 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4150 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 22,051 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5501 | 25% |
| Smokes | 6974 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 6034 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 3542 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,173,084 of utility $97 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 19 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | momo | 56% | 211 |
| #2 | Rotak | 51% | 132 |
| #3 | kektemps⌛ | 51% | 87 |
| #4 | ✪ Xkaso^_- ★ | 50% | 32 |
| #5 | Jonney | 49% | 285 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | meshuggah | 44% | 41 |
| #8 | PRiMUS | 43% | 108 |
| #9 | Spr|ng | 42% | 52 |
| #10 | TI-BILL | 39% | 41 |
| #11 | luvkill | 35% | 37 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jonney | 18 | 0.0030 |
| #2 | momo | 11 | 0.0025 |
| #3 | Rotak | 5 | 0.0018 |
| #4 | porteavion | 4 | 0.0014 |
| #5 | kektemps⌛ | 4 | 0.0022 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | momo | 669 | 0.15 | 17 min |
| #2 | Rotak | 432 | 0.15 | 10 min |
| #3 | Jonney | 253 | 0.04 | 5 min |
| #4 | PRiMUS | 184 | 0.09 | 5 min |
| #5 | porteavion | 180 | 0.06 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | momo | +2.32 | 64 | 77 |
| #2 | ✪ Xkaso^_- ★ | +1.61 | 75 | 76 |
| #3 | Jonney | +1.42 | 70 | 53 |
| #4 | meshuggah | +0.81 | 55 | 60 |
| #5 | kektemps⌛ | +0.63 | 68 | 55 |





