








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1215 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 409 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 70 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 58 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 154 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




50 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7398 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 38,515 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 11159 | 29% |
| Smokes | 8320 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 10629 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 8407 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $742,826 of utility $48 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1394 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ridox | 56% | 39 |
| #2 | Mike | 56% | 211 |
| #3 | brnsn | 56% | 48 |
| #4 | Jonney | 56% | 109 |
| #5 | porteavion | 53% | 60 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | nekio | 51% | 69 |
| #9 | Rotak | 49% | 68 |
| #10 | bEn | 48% | 93 |
| #11 | lws. | 47% | 62 |
| #12 | ✪ Xkaso^_- ★ | 45% | 95 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mike | 11 | 0.0025 |
| #2 | luvkill | 8 | 0.0058 |
| #3 | nekio | 3 | 0.0021 |
| #4 | lws. | 3 | 0.0023 |
| #5 | Jonney | 2 | 0.0009 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mike | 453 | 0.10 | 10 min |
| #2 | bEn | 348 | 0.18 | 8 min |
| #3 | PRiMUS | 346 | 0.09 | 8 min |
| #4 | ✪ Xkaso^_- ★ | 313 | 0.16 | 8 min |
| #5 | lws. | 312 | 0.24 | 8 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | momo | +2.07 | 67 | 75 |
| #2 | ridox | +1.15 | 79 | 77 |
| #3 | Jonney | +0.98 | 71 | 57 |
| #4 | Rotak | +0.57 | 61 | 61 |
| #5 | PRiMUS | -0.09 | 69 | 63 |





