








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 421 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 122 matches | ||
| Premier | 101 matches | ||
| Wingman | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 32 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3034 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,151 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1752 | 17% |
| Smokes | 2989 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 2818 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 2592 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,126,659 of utility $175 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 828 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rubinstern | 72% | 36 |
| #2 | Keli96 | 67% | 82 |
| #3 | Lars | 65% | 97 |
| #4 | kulsi~ | 63% | 67 |
| #5 | ✪ sJEF | 60% | 102 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | kulsi~ | 63% | 67 |
| #5 | ✪ sJEF | 60% | 102 |
| #6 | Tom Fugleri | 59% | 44 |
| #7 | Deswatem | 53% | 38 |
| #8 | Chillnub | 52% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ sJEF | 4 | 0.0017 |
| #2 | kulsi~ | 3 | 0.0021 |
| #3 | Lars | 2 | 0.0010 |
| #4 | Keli96 | 2 | 0.0011 |
| #5 | Rubinstern | 1 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Keli96 | 282 | 0.15 | 9 min |
| #2 | kulsi~ | 246 | 0.17 | 6 min |
| #3 | Rubinstern | 229 | 0.28 | 7 min |
| #4 | ✪ sJEF | 198 | 0.09 | 5 min |
| #5 | Lars | 174 | 0.08 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ sJEF | +2.16 | 77 | 56 |
| #2 | kulsi~ | +1.96 | 75 | 68 |
| #3 | Lars | +1.89 | 44 | 68 |
| #4 | Navilicous | +1.13 | 63 | 55 |
| #5 | Keli96 | +0.55 | 72 | 74 |





