








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 234 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 174 matches | ||
| Faceit | 47 matches | ||
| Wingman | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 40 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2816 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,700 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1097 | 16% |
| Smokes | 2122 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 1619 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 1862 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,531,078 of utility $228 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 72 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ncls | 71% | 24 |
| #2 | Keli96 | 68% | 22 |
| #3 | Lars | 56% | 34 |
| #4 | Navilicous | 53% | 38 |
| #5 | Dirty boi / Poor boi | 52% | 33 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Dirty boi / Poor boi | 52% | 33 |
| #6 | Somnax_ | 50% | 20 |
| #7 | MaGnetiC | 49% | 51 |
| #8 | ✪ sJEF | 49% | 43 |
| #9 | Tom Fugleri | 48% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MaGnetiC | 1 | 0.0009 |
| #2 | ✪ sJEF | 1 | 0.0010 |
| #3 | Tom Fugleri | 1 | 0.0021 |
| #4 | Somnax_ | 1 | 0.0024 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MaGnetiC | 252 | 0.24 | 7 min |
| #2 | ✪ sJEF | 122 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| #3 | Ncls | 118 | 0.24 | 2 min |
| #4 | Tom Fugleri | 109 | 0.23 | 2 min |
| #5 | Dirty boi / Poor boi | 93 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ncls | +4.42 | 83 | 60 |
| #2 | ✪ sJEF | +3.13 | 79 | 55 |
| #3 | Somnax_ | +2.87 | 82 | 64 |
| #4 | Lars | +2.50 | 38 | 70 |
| #5 | Keli96 | +2.16 | 69 | 73 |





