








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1067 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 334 matches | ||
| Premier | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 38 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3347 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 17,193 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4004 | 23% |
| Smokes | 4038 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 4601 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 4550 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,238,730 of utility $132 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 38 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | n0rppa | 62% | 104 |
| #2 | Johnny F. Raider | 61% | 69 |
| #3 | Blade of Saeldor | 60% | 45 |
| #4 | Mathe | 59% | 54 |
| #5 | stemu | 58% | 60 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #14 | PSOTY | 54% | 197 |
| #15 | NuGzMeister | 52% | 61 |
| #16 | M8 | 52% | 63 |
| #17 | Natzku☂ | 47% | 102 |
| #18 | lystimpi | 33% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Рэй <> | 14 | 0.0062 |
| #2 | PSOTY | 9 | 0.0020 |
| #3 | Khasq | 9 | 0.0031 |
| #4 | Natzku☂ | 5 | 0.0021 |
| #5 | Iikkaaaa | 4 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PSOTY | 772 | 0.17 | 22 min |
| #2 | Kakkanen | 765 | 0.20 | 21 min |
| #3 | Khasq | 556 | 0.19 | 15 min |
| #4 | ePä ReHtI☂ ePäBaNjO☂ | 445 | 0.18 | 14 min |
| #5 | Johnny F. Raider | 278 | 0.18 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kakkanen | +3.16 | 84 | 77 |
| #2 | Johnny F. Raider | +2.59 | 80 | 78 |
| #3 | PSOTY | +2.42 | 81 | 71 |
| #4 | Natzku☂ | +2.21 | 79 | 61 |
| #5 | M8 | +1.48 | 81 | 50 |





