








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1343 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 411 matches | ||
| Premier | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 65 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5447 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 19,417 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4936 | 25% |
| Smokes | 5628 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 4360 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 4493 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,564,859 of utility $141 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1044 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mathe | 70% | 56 |
| #2 | djin | 69% | 35 |
| #3 | Blade of Saeldor | 64% | 53 |
| #4 | Glastone | 64% | 47 |
| #5 | PSOTY | 64% | 129 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #15 | Jokke | 54% | 112 |
| #16 | Kakkanen | 54% | 254 |
| #17 | HeimoBoy | 53% | 77 |
| #18 | lystimpi | 50% | 26 |
| #19 | irppa | 50% | 30 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Рэй <> | 7 | 0.0030 |
| #2 | Natzku☂ | 4 | 0.0010 |
| #3 | Khasq | 4 | 0.0012 |
| #4 | PSOTY | 4 | 0.0014 |
| #5 | Iikkaaaa | 3 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kakkanen | 1090 | 0.19 | 29 min |
| #2 | Khasq | 611 | 0.18 | 16 min |
| #3 | Johnny F. Raider | 480 | 0.19 | 12 min |
| #4 | PSOTY | 439 | 0.15 | 14 min |
| #5 | Natzku☂ | 399 | 0.10 | 10 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PSOTY | +2.41 | 82 | 73 |
| #2 | Natzku☂ | +2.40 | 78 | 59 |
| #3 | Kakkanen | +2.16 | 80 | 78 |
| #4 | Рэй <> | +1.72 | 80 | 64 |
| #5 | Johnny F. Raider | +1.71 | 75 | 74 |





