








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1377 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 686 matches | ||
| Premier | 75 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 29 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




27 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
9370 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 38,173 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 10007 | 26% |
| Smokes | 10938 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 7968 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 9260 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,456,222 of utility $130 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 365 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | djin | 64% | 80 |
| #2 | HeimoBoy | 60% | 134 |
| #3 | PSOTY | 59% | 352 |
| #4 | Jokke | 58% | 126 |
| #5 | ePä ReHtI☂ ePäBaNjO☂ | 57% | 144 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #16 | Kakkanen | 54% | 396 |
| #17 | M8 | 52% | 215 |
| #18 | Blade of Saeldor | 51% | 79 |
| #19 | Johnny F. Raider | 50% | 163 |
| #20 | Glastone | 44% | 55 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | djin | 10 | 0.0052 |
| #2 | PSOTY | 7 | 0.0009 |
| #3 | M8 | 5 | 0.0010 |
| #4 | Jokke | 5 | 0.0017 |
| #5 | Kakkanen | 4 | 0.0004 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kakkanen | 1735 | 0.19 | 45 min |
| #2 | PSOTY | 1223 | 0.16 | 35 min |
| #3 | Johnny F. Raider | 743 | 0.20 | 19 min |
| #4 | ePä ReHtI☂ ePäBaNjO☂ | 566 | 0.17 | 17 min |
| #5 | Iikkaaaa | 536 | 0.09 | 12 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kakkanen | +1.95 | 76 | 77 |
| #2 | PSOTY | +1.94 | 81 | 70 |
| #3 | Johnny F. Raider | +1.91 | 76 | 80 |
| #4 | Natzku☂ | +1.31 | 78 | 59 |
| #5 | stemu | +1.10 | 73 | 59 |





