








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 502 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 107 matches | ||
| Esplay | 98 matches | 2,001 | |
| Premier | 97 matches | ||
| Wingman | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 53 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2844 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,391 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2196 | 18% |
| Smokes | 3385 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 3382 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 3428 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,353,819 of utility $193 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 802 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Stray | 68% | 31 |
| #2 | k0nabear | 58% | 69 |
| #3 | SIMSY ツ | 58% | 19 |
| #4 | GIMS | 57% | 37 |
| #5 | RobbinAK | 57% | 67 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | reven | 52% | 58 |
| #9 | Avaera | 52% | 60 |
| #10 | NisseFrø- *NoScopeGlasses | 50% | 18 |
| #11 | nico | 41% | 34 |
| #12 | Lundinho | 40% | 20 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | k0nabear | 5 | 0.0034 |
| #2 | Stray | 2 | 0.0035 |
| #3 | asK ? | 1 | 0.0020 |
| #4 | NisseFrø- *NoScopeGlasses | 1 | 0.0024 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | k0nabear | 386 | 0.26 | 11 min |
| #2 | RobbinAK | 213 | 0.14 | 7 min |
| #3 | reven | 208 | 0.16 | 7 min |
| #4 | B1asp | 171 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| #5 | GIMS | 143 | 0.18 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | k0nabear | +3.43 | 87 | 84 |
| #2 | GIMS | +3.10 | 86 | 75 |
| #3 | Stray | +2.53 | 71 | 69 |
| #4 | reven | +2.04 | 69 | 76 |
| #5 | RobbinAK | +1.92 | 66 | 76 |





