








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 82 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Agency | 43 matches | ||
| Premier | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 79 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1649 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,224 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1585 | 30% |
| Smokes | 1760 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 1260 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 619 | 12% |
Our logs show you have wasted $552,228 of utility $135 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 153 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | NN1CKE> | 58% | 19 |
| #2 | HEISENBERG | 56% | 32 |
| #3 | Wajja | 55% | 22 |
| #4 | Abdul Yildrum | 50% | 14 |
| #5 | KebabStockExperten.se | 46% | 37 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #12 | Touring Liam | 38% | 13 |
| #13 | Munchis | 37% | 19 |
| #14 | totally spies | 36% | 66 |
| #15 | Bipolar Owl | 36% | 56 |
| #16 | dilanohagen_ | 33% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sweden > Norway | 6 | 0.0092 |
| #2 | KebabStockExperten.se | 5 | 0.0071 |
| #3 | dilanohagen_ | 3 | 0.0084 |
| #4 | totally spies | 2 | 0.0015 |
| #5 | HEISENBERG | 2 | 0.0031 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sweden > Norway | 126 | 0.19 | 2 min |
| #2 | Wajja | 77 | 0.19 | 2 min |
| #3 | HEISENBERG | 72 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #4 | dilanohagen_ | 64 | 0.18 | 1 min |
| #5 | NN1CKE> | 58 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Touring Liam | +5.90 | 79 | 53 |
| #2 | Abdul Yildrum | +4.02 | 78 | 64 |
| #3 | Sweden > Norway | +2.46 | 56 | 53 |
| #4 | NN1CKE> | +1.90 | 46 | 52 |
| #5 | UNCLE CYBER | +1.80 | 47 | 26 |





