








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 546 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 360 matches | ||
| Premier | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Renown | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 73 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3202 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,231 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1677 | 18% |
| Smokes | 3278 | 36% |
| HE Grenades | 1762 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 2514 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,096,561 of utility $124 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 370 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Johnny F. Raider | 71% | 35 |
| #2 | HeimoBoy | 64% | 50 |
| #3 | stemu | 62% | 68 |
| #4 | Blade of Saeldor | 56% | 32 |
| #5 | Natzku☂ | 56% | 25 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #14 | Khasq | 52% | 215 |
| #15 | ygy shot jusuf | 51% | 37 |
| #16 | Glastone | 50% | 22 |
| #17 | Kakkanen | 47% | 134 |
| #18 | irppa | 45% | 55 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Khasq | 4 | 0.0008 |
| #2 | PSOTY | 4 | 0.0008 |
| #3 | Iikkaaaa | 2 | 0.0007 |
| #4 | stemu | 2 | 0.0013 |
| #5 | djin | 2 | 0.0027 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Khasq | 899 | 0.18 | 22 min |
| #2 | PSOTY | 776 | 0.16 | 23 min |
| #3 | Kakkanen | 571 | 0.19 | 15 min |
| #4 | Iikkaaaa | 292 | 0.11 | 7 min |
| #5 | ePä ReHtI☂ ePäBaNjO☂ | 230 | 0.14 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Johnny F. Raider | +2.75 | 77 | 82 |
| #2 | Kakkanen | +2.13 | 82 | 78 |
| #3 | PSOTY | +1.85 | 80 | 71 |
| #4 | Natzku☂ | +1.39 | 71 | 67 |
| #5 | Рэй <> | +1.30 | 78 | 61 |





