








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 532 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 77 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 25 matches | ||
| Faceit | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 21 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




24 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2436 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,779 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2494 | 28% |
| Smokes | 2058 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 2183 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 2044 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $595,671 of utility $94 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 497 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BagZ | 59% | 22 |
| #2 | 俺の左の乳首が痒い | 52% | 21 |
| #3 | Beans, gentlemen | 50% | 26 |
| #4 | infinity ☾ | 50% | 26 |
| #5 | Maevvy | 48% | 84 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chad Ryan | +2.24 | 81 | 55 |
| #2 | 俺の左の乳首が痒い | +2.16 | 67 | 72 |
| #3 | Maevvy | +1.17 | 68 | 43 |
| #4 | BagZ | +1.08 | 65 | 47 |
| #5 | RGriffer | +0.38 | 71 | 67 |





