








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1200 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Nuke | 132 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 112 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 65 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 34 matches | ||
| Premier | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 17 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




69 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6397 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,138 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3778 | 34% |
| Smokes | 2052 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 2068 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 3240 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,204,012 of utility $168 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 11255 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | masculine manly man | 244 | 0.05 | 6 min |
| #2 | movement player | 161 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #3 | {DtF}Diddle Me Dis? Diddy Do It? | 152 | 0.14 | 4 min |
| #4 | <#6d32a8>Mach1nka | 90 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| #5 | {DTF} Paige | 90 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | xhott | +3.69 | 81 | 53 |
| #2 | peace:// | +2.73 | 31 | 46 |
| #3 | <#6d32a8>Mach1nka | +2.06 | 69 | 50 |
| #4 | nel | +1.82 | 55 | 39 |
| #5 | {DTF} Paige | +1.16 | 33 | 43 |





