








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 559 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 358 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Premier | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 18 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3435 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,626 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5367 | 34% |
| Smokes | 4399 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1916 | 12% |
| Molotovs | 3944 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,343,568 of utility $164 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1490 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BarrelDickson | 67% | 49 |
| #2 | Schmodda on YT | 65% | 40 |
| #3 | P4rma | 63% | 62 |
| #4 | 127mjb | 63% | 32 |
| #5 | Lt. DanielSon | 61% | 77 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #13 | Banda | 55% | 78 |
| #14 | Cal | 54% | 125 |
| #15 | hitsy | 52% | 63 |
| #16 | CLB o.O | 51% | 69 |
| #17 | cimok | 45% | 44 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Randyman <3 | 8 | 0.0022 |
| #2 | The Reaper | 4 | 0.0014 |
| #3 | CLB o.O | 4 | 0.0027 |
| #4 | P4rma | 4 | 0.0029 |
| #5 | Lt. DanielSon | 2 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lt. DanielSon | 367 | 0.20 | 10 min |
| #2 | Cal | 265 | 0.10 | 8 min |
| #3 | Banda | 227 | 0.13 | 6 min |
| #4 | Randyman <3 | 169 | 0.05 | 5 min |
| #5 | P4rma | 160 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | WILS♡N | +3.00 | 87 | 68 |
| #2 | P4rma | +2.57 | 82 | 69 |
| #3 | Schmodda on YT | +1.68 | 64 | 67 |
| #4 | Lt. DanielSon | +1.59 | 58 | 79 |
| #5 | Cal | +1.56 | 79 | 76 |





