








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 547 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Vertigo | 177 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 98 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 76 matches | ||
| Premier | 58 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 30 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




43 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3829 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,277 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5250 | 34% |
| Smokes | 3734 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 3772 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 2521 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,110,377 of utility $106 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 117 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PepsiPhipsen | 52% | 107 |
| #2 | copium | 48% | 52 |
| #3 | Purple | 48% | 300 |
| #4 | GaBson | 48% | 225 |
| #5 | monty 愛 | 45% | 302 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | copium | 48% | 52 |
| #3 | Purple | 48% | 300 |
| #4 | GaBson | 48% | 225 |
| #5 | monty 愛 | 45% | 302 |
| #6 | Obizzle | 45% | 379 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GaBson | 34 | 0.0074 |
| #2 | Obizzle | 28 | 0.0037 |
| #3 | monty 愛 | 15 | 0.0025 |
| #4 | Purple | 8 | 0.0013 |
| #5 | copium | 7 | 0.0065 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GaBson | 751 | 0.16 | 19 min |
| #2 | Purple | 493 | 0.08 | 12 min |
| #3 | monty 愛 | 432 | 0.07 | 10 min |
| #4 | Obizzle | 411 | 0.05 | 10 min |
| #5 | copium | 187 | 0.17 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GaBson | +2.06 | 74 | 66 |
| #2 | Purple | +2.00 | 57 | 64 |
| #3 | monty 愛 | +1.16 | 74 | 50 |
| #4 | copium | +0.13 | 63 | 71 |
| #5 | Obizzle | -0.13 | 53 | 54 |





