








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 741 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 23 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1903 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,953 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 508 | 26% |
| Smokes | 451 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 683 | 35% |
| Molotovs | 311 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $249,727 of utility $69 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 692 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kozzy | 76% | 21 |
| #2 | Deyone Gibson | 64% | 39 |
| #3 | Ivdea Delenda Est | 60% | 10 |
| #4 | CrazyJoven | 59% | 74 |
| #5 | schrimblo | 56% | 73 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | niin o | 25 | 0.0114 |
| #2 | CrazyJoven | 10 | 0.0071 |
| #3 | schrimblo | 6 | 0.0041 |
| #4 | Deyone Gibson | 5 | 0.0066 |
| #5 | SafetySpoon | 5 | 0.0085 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | niin o | 266 | 0.12 | 6 min |
| #2 | CrazyJoven | 113 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| #3 | Deyone Gibson | 97 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #4 | schrimblo | 80 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| #5 | wuju style | 69 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kozzy | +5.53 | 88 | 59 |
| #2 | Glucose Guardian | +5.36 | 95 | 41 |
| #3 | niin o | +3.89 | 94 | 59 |
| #4 | wuju style | -1.33 | 46 | 54 |
| #5 | schrimblo | -1.64 | 47 | 36 |





