








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 204 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 79 matches | ||
| Premier | 58 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 61 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2373 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,109 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2316 | 25% |
| Smokes | 2236 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 2332 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 2225 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $408,966 of utility $95 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 117 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | X_Stone13 | 52% | 54 |
| #8 | emO- | 51% | 82 |
| #9 | Sorryyy | 43% | 14 |
| #10 | laul | 42% | 12 |
| #11 | ✪ BroKeN 暁 | 31% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KenPachi | 7 | 0.0034 |
| #2 | X_Stone13 | 4 | 0.0034 |
| #3 | emO- | 3 | 0.0017 |
| #4 | ✪ BroKeN 暁 | 1 | 0.0029 |
| #5 | Sorryyy | 1 | 0.0035 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KenPachi | 385 | 0.19 | 9 min |
| #2 | emO- | 328 | 0.19 | 7 min |
| #3 | X_Stone13 | 161 | 0.14 | 4 min |
| #4 | NaaDx | 153 | 0.17 | 3 min |
| #5 | laul | 64 | 0.25 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sniffles | +2.18 | 82 | 61 |
| #2 | Joe Daniel's en PiiWii | +1.76 | 73 | 62 |
| #3 | emO- | +1.24 | 82 | 55 |
| #4 | NaaDx | +1.13 | 68 | 62 |
| #5 | KenPachi | -0.24 | 78 | 61 |





