








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1033 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 183 matches | ||
| Faceit | 176 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 18 matches | ||
| Wingman | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 58 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




54 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5573 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,277 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4908 | 34% |
| Smokes | 3792 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 2859 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 2718 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,009,186 of utility $193 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 349 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MD_abeL.* | 58% | 36 |
| #2 | SK | 58% | 26 |
| #3 | NIGHT'S WATCH | 58% | 66 |
| #4 | NaaDx | 53% | 138 |
| #5 | Joe Daniel's en PiiWii | 51% | 82 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | X_Stone13 | 50% | 155 |
| #7 | KenPachi | 49% | 89 |
| #8 | Vatos94 | 43% | 37 |
| #9 | Sniffles | 42% | 36 |
| #10 | w#MomentosMágicos | 37% | 35 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | NaaDx | 10 | 0.0035 |
| #2 | X_Stone13 | 9 | 0.0027 |
| #3 | KenPachi | 8 | 0.0041 |
| #4 | NIGHT'S WATCH | 6 | 0.0045 |
| #5 | Joe Daniel's en PiiWii | 3 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | NaaDx | 551 | 0.19 | 12 min |
| #2 | X_Stone13 | 456 | 0.14 | 11 min |
| #3 | KenPachi | 384 | 0.20 | 9 min |
| #4 | Joe Daniel's en PiiWii | 374 | 0.21 | 10 min |
| #5 | NIGHT'S WATCH | 300 | 0.22 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SK | +3.46 | 81 | 60 |
| #2 | emO- | +2.07 | 83 | 54 |
| #3 | MD_abeL.* | +1.88 | 79 | 64 |
| #4 | NaaDx | +1.80 | 75 | 65 |
| #5 | Joe Daniel's en PiiWii | +1.60 | 74 | 66 |





