








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 287 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 74 matches | ||
| Premier | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 22 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2150 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,016 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1624 | 20% |
| Smokes | 2393 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 1596 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 2403 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $755,088 of utility $161 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 201 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | REKMEISTER | 53% | 15 |
| #2 | Hello | 52% | 23 |
| #3 | LEVI | 50% | 20 |
| #4 | sammy_boy.GG | 48% | 23 |
| #5 | Dudley__ | 42% | 12 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Hello | 52% | 23 |
| #3 | LEVI | 50% | 20 |
| #4 | sammy_boy.GG | 48% | 23 |
| #5 | Dudley__ | 42% | 12 |
| #6 | AdderallEnjoyer | 42% | 24 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | REKMEISTER | 4 | 0.0137 |
| #2 | Dudley__ | 3 | 0.0111 |
| #3 | AdderallEnjoyer | 1 | 0.0019 |
| #4 | Hello | 1 | 0.0021 |
| #5 | sammy_boy.GG | 1 | 0.0021 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LEVI | 138 | 0.35 | 3 min |
| #2 | AdderallEnjoyer | 102 | 0.20 | 2 min |
| #3 | sammy_boy.GG | 76 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| #4 | Hello | 63 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| #5 | REKMEISTER | 39 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | REKMEISTER | +8.39 | 89 | 68 |
| #2 | LEVI | +1.60 | 67 | 73 |
| #3 | icyfire48 | +1.59 | 67 | 63 |
| #4 | sammy_boy.GG | +1.34 | 85 | 57 |
| #5 | Hello | -0.66 | 72 | 62 |





