








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2303 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Ancient | 104 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 71 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 70 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 64 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 59 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 55 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 55 matches | ||
| Faceit | 40 matches | ||
| Wingman | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 30 matches | ||
| Premier | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 23 different maps





Our logs show 106 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




254 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
12716 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 24,258 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5544 | 23% |
| Smokes | 5217 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 6422 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 7075 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,621,401 of utility $116 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 798 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ♥ cherry | 75% | 76 |
| #2 | meggaroni | 72% | 47 |
| #3 | 'WaterMelonCrusher' | 62% | 77 |
| #4 | LouX13 | 62% | 37 |
| #5 | B1gBeefHarr1son | 60% | 174 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | B1gBeefHarr1son | 632 | 0.18 | 16 min |
| #2 | lilwill^GG | 519 | 0.19 | 14 min |
| #3 | 'WaterMelonCrusher' | 496 | 0.32 | 11 min |
| #4 | R⁵⁴ | 289 | 0.10 | 7 min |
| #5 | jerhms | 287 | 0.08 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | REKMEISTER | +8.29 | 93 | 65 |
| #2 | jchancE | +4.63 | 83 | 66 |
| #3 | R⁵⁴ | +0.66 | 86 | 55 |
| #4 | B1gBeefHarr1son | -0.47 | 63 | 65 |
| #5 | lilwill^GG | -0.49 | 56 | 66 |





