








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 806 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 256 matches | ||
| Wingman | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 137 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




31 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2209 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,512 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1748 | 32% |
| Smokes | 701 | 13% |
| HE Grenades | 2066 | 37% |
| Molotovs | 997 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $421,251 of utility $64 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 484 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | Hobo | 43% | 23 |
| #8 | Ratz | Knallskott | 43% | 207 |
| #9 | Professional Bitch | 43% | 150 |
| #10 | Ratz | Castle | 39% | 46 |
| #11 | poo | 32% | 19 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ratz | Castle | 10 | 0.0113 |
| #2 | Ratz | Knallskott | 9 | 0.0022 |
| #3 | Ratz | Chaotic Neutral | 4 | 0.0014 |
| #4 | Ratz | lihou969 | 3 | 0.0015 |
| #5 | poo | 3 | 0.0075 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ratz | Knallskott | 188 | 0.05 | 4 min |
| #2 | Hobo | 131 | 0.28 | 3 min |
| #3 | Ratz | Castle | 80 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #4 | Ratz | lihou969 | 73 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| #5 | Professional Bitch | 65 | 0.02 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ratz | mr2 | +1.97 | 82 | 37 |
| #2 | Ratz | Mummadude | +1.36 | 52 | 40 |
| #3 | Ratz | Krooz^ | +0.30 | 58 | 34 |
| #4 | Ratz | lihou969 | +0.27 | 61 | 62 |
| #5 | Ratz | Castle | -0.24 | 64 | 53 |





