








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 229 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 124 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show 48 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1170 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,525 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1321 | 24% |
| Smokes | 1547 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1147 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 1510 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $485,923 of utility $160 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 61 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Playz | 75% | 8 |
| #2 | xpRim | 66% | 64 |
| #3 | Pingo_vn | 64% | 53 |
| #4 | djiKON | 61% | 67 |
| #5 | KAYMAAKjjang | 58% | 98 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | zalek | 50% | 8 |
| #10 | chan`cyalan.com | 50% | 14 |
| #11 | Dr.KinSlayeR | 49% | 37 |
| #12 | 梁WEILONG | 38% | 26 |
| #13 | hY0LOf | 32% | 28 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | djiKON | 1 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KAYMAAKjjang | 404 | 0.19 | 11 min |
| #2 | xpRim | 182 | 0.13 | 4 min |
| #3 | djiKON | 179 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| #4 | Pingo_vn | 174 | 0.15 | 5 min |
| #5 | syz | 167 | 0.21 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KAYMAAKjjang | +2.55 | 61 | 78 |
| #2 | Kyo* | +2.04 | 85 | 75 |
| #3 | xpRim | +1.61 | 66 | 64 |
| #4 | Playz | +1.51 | 75 | 70 |
| #5 | syz | +1.19 | 69 | 81 |





