








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 252 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 240 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 77 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2873 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,438 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1901 | 26% |
| Smokes | 1820 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 1550 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 2167 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,074,085 of utility $173 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 711 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Blainezy | 63% | 19 |
| #2 | ike^.- | 57% | 23 |
| #3 | πΆπͺπ½π½π α΄4α΄ | 55% | 44 |
| #4 | OhJay | 54% | 68 |
| #5 | Sora η©Ί | 54% | 76 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | dis is y im hot u aint cuz u not | 47% | 119 |
| #10 | WDT | 47% | 32 |
| #11 | Blaze | 45% | 196 |
| #12 | ovec | 38% | 29 |
| #13 | wks | 31% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Blaze | 6 | 0.0014 |
| #2 | Sora η©Ί | 6 | 0.0036 |
| #3 | OhJay | 4 | 0.0027 |
| #4 | dis is y im hot u aint cuz u not | 2 | 0.0008 |
| #5 | ovec | 2 | 0.0031 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dis is y im hot u aint cuz u not | 449 | 0.18 | 11 min |
| #2 | John Globson | 249 | 0.17 | 7 min |
| #3 | Blaze | 225 | 0.05 | 6 min |
| #4 | Sora η©Ί | 198 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| #5 | OhJay | 167 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | WDT | +2.34 | 85 | 53 |
| #2 | ike^.- | +2.30 | 83 | 59 |
| #3 | Blaze | +1.83 | 72 | 59 |
| #4 | OhJay | +1.40 | 63 | 68 |
| #5 | Blainezy | +0.93 | 82 | 49 |





