








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 910 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 175 matches | ||
| Wingman | 145 matches | ||
| Faceit | 68 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 23 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4279 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,132 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3673 | 28% |
| Smokes | 4066 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 1969 | 15% |
| Molotovs | 3424 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $970,992 of utility $116 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 156 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | spt | 66% | 65 |
| #2 | kallej | 66% | 29 |
| #3 | AweeP | 65% | 97 |
| #4 | Dorkan | 62% | 73 |
| #5 | Devlyn | 60% | 144 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Devlyn | 60% | 144 |
| #6 | fr4ll3 | 57% | 30 |
| #7 | sensie | 56% | 306 |
| #8 | bäri | 55% | 128 |
| #9 | mabbe ツ | 55% | 64 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bäri | 3 | 0.0012 |
| #2 | spt | 3 | 0.0022 |
| #3 | AweeP | 2 | 0.0010 |
| #4 | kallej | 2 | 0.0034 |
| #5 | sensie | 1 | 0.0002 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Devlyn | 911 | 0.32 | 25 min |
| #2 | AweeP | 298 | 0.15 | 10 min |
| #3 | sensie | 291 | 0.06 | 7 min |
| #4 | mabbe ツ | 213 | 0.15 | 7 min |
| #5 | bäri | 201 | 0.08 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bjork | +2.48 | 86 | 59 |
| #2 | fr4ll3 | +1.72 | 76 | 65 |
| #3 | kallej | +1.60 | 86 | 74 |
| #4 | AweeP | +1.17 | 68 | 75 |
| #5 | Dorkan | +0.83 | 71 | 69 |





