










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 572 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 527 matches | ||
| Faceit | 127 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 27 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7764 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,607 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5805 | 37% |
| Smokes | 5566 | 36% |
| HE Grenades | 3713 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 523 | 3% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,854,660 of utility $181 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 32 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tomasusus | 55% | 98 |
| #2 | TACO | 55% | 144 |
| #3 | Punct | 54% | 263 |
| #4 | ElfAngelx | 53% | 471 |
| #5 | porq | 50% | 301 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | Exilir | 47% | 186 |
| #8 | axE | 47% | 239 |
| #9 | Ancient Lord | 47% | 246 |
| #10 | GipsyKing | 46% | 56 |
| #11 | rzv | 42% | 65 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ElfAngelx | 15 | 0.0015 |
| #2 | Exilir | 14 | 0.0035 |
| #3 | Punct | 11 | 0.0019 |
| #4 | Ancient Lord | 7 | 0.0013 |
| #5 | porq | 6 | 0.0009 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ElfAngelx | 1351 | 0.13 | 38 min |
| #2 | Punct | 693 | 0.12 | 19 min |
| #3 | Ancient Lord | 504 | 0.09 | 13 min |
| #4 | axE | 401 | 0.08 | 10 min |
| #5 | TACO | 264 | 0.08 | 8 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TACO | +2.93 | 60 | 62 |
| #2 | ElfAngelx | +1.68 | 55 | 80 |
| #3 | Punct | +1.49 | 75 | 75 |
| #4 | evoL | +0.73 | 50 | 57 |
| #5 | Exilir | +0.69 | 51 | 50 |





