








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 286 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 314 matches | ||
| Faceit | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3861 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,287 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2620 | 17% |
| Smokes | 4418 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 4317 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 3932 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,664,436 of utility $185 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 343 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nowoit | 63% | 46 |
| #2 | Brooky | 58% | 95 |
| #3 | ❥ Molly | 54% | 46 |
| #4 | used to be pretty good_ | 53% | 157 |
| #5 | jp | 50% | 32 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JC | 7 | 0.0010 |
| #2 | Pruneman | 5 | 0.0012 |
| #3 | nibk | 4 | 0.0005 |
| #4 | Brooky | 4 | 0.0019 |
| #5 | used to be pretty good_ | 3 | 0.0009 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JC | 721 | 0.11 | 20 min |
| #2 | nibk | 581 | 0.08 | 17 min |
| #3 | used to be pretty good_ | 543 | 0.16 | 15 min |
| #4 | Pruneman | 338 | 0.08 | 10 min |
| #5 | giohm | 213 | 0.21 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nowoit | +3.59 | 73 | 60 |
| #2 | Brooky | +3.44 | 79 | 60 |
| #3 | nibk | +2.13 | 65 | 64 |
| #4 | Tristay!^^ | +0.89 | 68 | 64 |
| #5 | giohm | +0.36 | 67 | 72 |





