








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2449 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 1190 matches | ||
| Wingman | 121 matches | ||
| Faceit | 97 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 146 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




26 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
16840 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 45,983 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 8982 | 20% |
| Smokes | 8281 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 16301 | 35% |
| Molotovs | 12419 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $5,143,875 of utility $162 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 160 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jp | 59% | 114 |
| #2 | Brooky | 58% | 231 |
| #3 | giohm | 57% | 133 |
| #4 | ❥ Molly | 51% | 284 |
| #5 | laxuz | 51% | 128 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | Pruneman | 47% | 655 |
| #9 | JC | 47% | 1158 |
| #10 | Exile | 46% | 113 |
| #11 | Kriggy | 46% | 272 |
| #12 | Lane | Klappar Skinkor | 43% | 128 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JC | 28 | 0.0012 |
| #2 | used to be pretty good_ | 23 | 0.0017 |
| #3 | Pruneman | 20 | 0.0014 |
| #4 | Tristay!^^ | 10 | 0.0013 |
| #5 | Brooky | 10 | 0.0020 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JC | 2269 | 0.10 | 66 min |
| #2 | used to be pretty good_ | 2042 | 0.15 | 59 min |
| #3 | Pruneman | 1050 | 0.08 | 29 min |
| #4 | giohm | 634 | 0.22 | 16 min |
| #5 | jp | 512 | 0.21 | 15 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | laxuz | +5.67 | 97 | 52 |
| #2 | Brooky | +3.84 | 79 | 59 |
| #3 | nibk | +2.42 | 67 | 64 |
| #4 | Exile | +2.37 | 67 | 31 |
| #5 | giohm | +0.61 | 69 | 71 |





