








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1066 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 1146 matches | ||
| Wingman | 143 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Faceit | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 33 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




34 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
12364 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 35,229 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 10234 | 29% |
| Smokes | 6313 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 10642 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 8040 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,628,697 of utility $90 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 104 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nowoit | 54% | 282 |
| #2 | Brooky | 52% | 103 |
| #3 | Tristay!^^ | 50% | 325 |
| #4 | ❥ Molly | 49% | 196 |
| #5 | used to be pretty good_ | 48% | 644 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | Pruneman | 47% | 685 |
| #8 | nibk | 47% | 1158 |
| #9 | Kriggy | 46% | 295 |
| #10 | Lane | Klappar Skinkor | 46% | 184 |
| #11 | Exile | 42% | 92 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | used to be pretty good_ | 28 | 0.0021 |
| #2 | nibk | 22 | 0.0009 |
| #3 | Pruneman | 20 | 0.0014 |
| #4 | ❥ Molly | 8 | 0.0019 |
| #5 | Tristay!^^ | 7 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | used to be pretty good_ | 1985 | 0.15 | 58 min |
| #2 | nibk | 1726 | 0.07 | 53 min |
| #3 | Pruneman | 1087 | 0.07 | 29 min |
| #4 | Tristay!^^ | 473 | 0.07 | 11 min |
| #5 | Lane | Klappar Skinkor | 434 | 0.11 | 10 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | laxuz | +6.07 | 98 | 53 |
| #2 | Brooky | +4.82 | 79 | 54 |
| #3 | nowoit | +3.13 | 69 | 59 |
| #4 | nibk | +2.81 | 68 | 64 |
| #5 | Exile | +2.64 | 67 | 32 |





