








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 671 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 113 matches | ||
| Premier | 83 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 25 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3628 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,853 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3842 | 28% |
| Smokes | 4097 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 3010 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 2904 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,306,299 of utility $177 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 439 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | REG-ULATORRR! | 66% | 47 |
| #2 | sHAW-.^ | 66% | 184 |
| #3 | Reeze Rog | 64% | 64 |
| #4 | ezsparq | 63% | 185 |
| #5 | ROME | 59% | 181 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | sHAW-.^ | 66% | 184 |
| #3 | Reeze Rog | 64% | 64 |
| #4 | ezsparq | 63% | 185 |
| #5 | ROME | 59% | 181 |
| #6 | Le1no | 56% | 137 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ROME | 5 | 0.0013 |
| #2 | ezsparq | 2 | 0.0005 |
| #3 | Le1no | 2 | 0.0007 |
| #4 | REG-ULATORRR! | 2 | 0.0021 |
| #5 | sHAW-.^ | 1 | 0.0003 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ROME | 926 | 0.25 | 22 min |
| #2 | sHAW-.^ | 571 | 0.15 | 14 min |
| #3 | ezsparq | 523 | 0.14 | 13 min |
| #4 | Le1no | 288 | 0.10 | 8 min |
| #5 | REG-ULATORRR! | 146 | 0.15 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ezsparq | +2.94 | 91 | 69 |
| #2 | ROME | +2.27 | 80 | 69 |
| #3 | REG-ULATORRR! | +1.40 | 79 | 61 |
| #4 | dmg7 | +1.35 | 77 | 61 |
| #5 | Le1no | +0.01 | 85 | 54 |





