








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 634 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 108 matches | ||
| Premier | 107 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 18 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 47 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6019 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 23,275 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6787 | 29% |
| Smokes | 6262 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 4499 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 5727 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $963,787 of utility $96 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1750 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ezsparq | 65% | 314 |
| #2 | sHAW-.^ | 60% | 239 |
| #3 | Le1no | 60% | 336 |
| #4 | Reeze Rog | 60% | 89 |
| #5 | REG-ULATORRR! | 59% | 135 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | sHAW-.^ | 60% | 239 |
| #3 | Le1no | 60% | 336 |
| #4 | Reeze Rog | 60% | 89 |
| #5 | REG-ULATORRR! | 59% | 135 |
| #6 | dmg7 | 59% | 181 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ezsparq | 8 | 0.0013 |
| #2 | Le1no | 7 | 0.0010 |
| #3 | sHAW-.^ | 4 | 0.0008 |
| #4 | dmg7 | 3 | 0.0008 |
| #5 | REG-ULATORRR! | 3 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ezsparq | 747 | 0.12 | 18 min |
| #2 | dmg7 | 669 | 0.18 | 15 min |
| #3 | Le1no | 658 | 0.10 | 18 min |
| #4 | sHAW-.^ | 650 | 0.13 | 15 min |
| #5 | REG-ULATORRR! | 368 | 0.14 | 9 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ezsparq | +2.89 | 91 | 68 |
| #2 | ROME | +2.23 | 79 | 70 |
| #3 | dmg7 | +0.46 | 75 | 58 |
| #4 | Le1no | +0.35 | 87 | 51 |
| #5 | REG-ULATORRR! | +0.27 | 78 | 59 |





