








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 862 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 699 matches | ||
| Wingman | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Esplay | 7 matches | 1,407 | |
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 47 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




25 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6287 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,606 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 600 | 5% |
| Smokes | 1197 | 10% |
| HE Grenades | 4772 | 41% |
| Molotovs | 5037 | 43% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,360,350 of utility $132 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 177 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Von Pertan | 50% | 140 |
| #2 | Vingen | 48% | 492 |
| #3 | jOL | 46% | 72 |
| #4 | Torsten | 45% | 332 |
| #5 | Sagittarius | 44% | 164 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | jOL | 46% | 72 |
| #4 | Torsten | 45% | 332 |
| #5 | Sagittarius | 44% | 164 |
| #6 | Jägarn | 43% | 283 |
| #7 | Master_Charlon | 43% | 217 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Von Pertan | 8 | 0.0026 |
| #2 | Vingen | 7 | 0.0007 |
| #3 | Torsten | 7 | 0.0010 |
| #4 | Master_Charlon | 6 | 0.0013 |
| #5 | Jägarn | 5 | 0.0009 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Vingen | 558 | 0.06 | 10 min |
| #2 | Torsten | 500 | 0.07 | 15 min |
| #3 | Master_Charlon | 462 | 0.10 | 12 min |
| #4 | Jägarn | 455 | 0.08 | 11 min |
| #5 | Sagittarius | 157 | 0.05 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jOL | +3.31 | 48 | 50 |
| #2 | Torsten | +2.65 | 63 | 70 |
| #3 | Solvit | +1.21 | 58 | 26 |
| #4 | Von Pertan | +0.92 | 49 | 54 |
| #5 | Vingen | -0.31 | 67 | 45 |





