








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 877 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 711 matches | ||
| Wingman | 53 matches | ||
| Esplay | 19 matches | 1,298 | |
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 22 different maps





Our logs show 62 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




31 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5605 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 22,968 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2362 | 10% |
| Smokes | 7857 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 8375 | 36% |
| Molotovs | 4374 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,420,812 of utility $195 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 717 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Habit º | 54% | 67 |
| #2 | Marco | 53% | 133 |
| #3 | Bowser | 52% | 66 |
| #4 | Torsten | 51% | 106 |
| #5 | Solvit | 50% | 140 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | pwnfish | 45% | 51 |
| #10 | Vingen | 45% | 129 |
| #11 | Master_Charlon | 43% | 124 |
| #12 | Jägarn | 43% | 117 |
| #13 | Sagittarius | 38% | 58 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BRRAPAPAPPA | 18 | 0.0053 |
| #2 | Marco | 7 | 0.0026 |
| #3 | jOL | 6 | 0.0009 |
| #4 | Solvit | 5 | 0.0016 |
| #5 | Vingen | 3 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Aelg | 337 | 0.07 | 9 min |
| #2 | BRRAPAPAPPA | 319 | 0.09 | 5 min |
| #3 | Marco | 252 | 0.09 | 6 min |
| #4 | Habit º | 200 | 0.15 | 4 min |
| #5 | Master_Charlon | 194 | 0.07 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jOL | +2.19 | 49 | 49 |
| #2 | pwnfish | +1.60 | 67 | 67 |
| #3 | Torsten | +1.59 | 60 | 72 |
| #4 | Habit º | +1.26 | 62 | 63 |
| #5 | Solvit | +1.13 | 59 | 31 |





