








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 141 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 393 matches | ||
| Faceit | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 40 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




18 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4674 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 19,443 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4980 | 26% |
| Smokes | 4002 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 6306 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 4155 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,203,456 of utility $117 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 242 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | kÄtkiLLeR69 | 50% | 42 |
| #5 | Hulpuka | 50% | 208 |
| #6 | Iso-E | 49% | 95 |
| #7 | MarZaa | 48% | 352 |
| #8 | miltsu<3 | 36% | 99 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MarZaa | 28 | 0.0038 |
| #2 | Iso-E | 12 | 0.0061 |
| #3 | Hulpuka | 11 | 0.0025 |
| #4 | kÄtkiLLeR69 | 10 | 0.0115 |
| #5 | Kassu | 4 | 0.0029 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MarZaa | 1570 | 0.21 | 44 min |
| #2 | Hulpuka | 702 | 0.16 | 19 min |
| #3 | Kassu | 313 | 0.23 | 9 min |
| #4 | miltsu<3 | 278 | 0.13 | 7 min |
| #5 | Iso-E | 225 | 0.11 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kassu | +1.92 | 79 | 60 |
| #2 | MarZaa | +1.70 | 82 | 71 |
| #3 | Hulpuka | +1.57 | 81 | 63 |
| #4 | PanzerMonki4 | +1.33 | 81 | 64 |
| #5 | kÄtkiLLeR69 | +1.17 | 59 | 64 |





