








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 400 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 77 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 13 matches | ||
| Wingman | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 14 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




102 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2486 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,622 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 561 | 35% |
| Smokes | 254 | 16% |
| HE Grenades | 386 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 421 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $710,448 of utility $115 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 237 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DuneKoon | 40% | 30 |
| #2 | η♡να | 38% | 76 |
| #3 | T3rpboy | 38% | 79 |
| #4 | dubois.charles | 38% | 101 |
| #5 | Pill Pusher Pushin' P | 36% | 161 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Pill Pusher Pushin' P | 36% | 161 |
| #6 | s1mpatico | 35% | 34 |
| #7 | GREEN BASTARD | 32% | 34 |
| #8 | Snacky1YT | 27% | 22 |
| #9 | DisKineKteD | 16% | 38 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pill Pusher Pushin' P | 96 | 0.0305 |
| #2 | η♡να | 32 | 0.0212 |
| #3 | Snacky1YT | 15 | 0.0336 |
| #4 | dubois.charles | 8 | 0.0041 |
| #5 | T3rpboy | 5 | 0.0033 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pill Pusher Pushin' P | 570 | 0.18 | 14 min |
| #2 | dubois.charles | 329 | 0.17 | 7 min |
| #3 | T3rpboy | 228 | 0.15 | 6 min |
| #4 | η♡να | 164 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #5 | DisKineKteD | 128 | 0.17 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DuneKoon | +3.64 | 64 | 54 |
| #2 | Pill Pusher Pushin' P | +1.87 | 80 | 61 |
| #3 | T3rpboy | +0.94 | 42 | 68 |
| #4 | dubois.charles | +0.27 | 52 | 59 |
| #5 | s1mpatico | -0.24 | 72 | 61 |





