








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 57 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 13 matches | ||
| Wingman | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




44 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1223 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,666 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1528 | 27% |
| Smokes | 1658 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 1124 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 1356 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $531,773 of utility $94 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 205 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kaynist | 52% | 81 |
| #2 | Spye | 50% | 125 |
| #3 | James Franklin | 50% | 34 |
| #4 | Ande | 49% | 114 |
| #5 | Dianitey | 43% | 200 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ricky lafleur | 26 | 0.0118 |
| #2 | Dianitey | 18 | 0.0048 |
| #3 | Ande | 8 | 0.0036 |
| #4 | Kaynist | 8 | 0.0049 |
| #5 | Spye | 7 | 0.0029 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ricky lafleur | 414 | 0.19 | 7 min |
| #2 | Ande | 229 | 0.10 | 5 min |
| #3 | Dianitey | 205 | 0.05 | 3 min |
| #4 | Kaynist | 121 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #5 | Spye | 106 | 0.04 | 3 min |





