








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 46 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
821 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 928 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 203 | 22% |
| Smokes | 183 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 278 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 264 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $378,334 of utility $191 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 29 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | Dylisious | 48% | 25 |
| #9 | You bad bad | 44% | 9 |
| #10 | MK 2.2 | 43% | 7 |
| #11 | Horuakati | 33% | 6 |
| #12 | ShuKai | 18% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dylisious | 4 | 0.0077 |
| #2 | Woo | 3 | 0.0027 |
| #3 | CAPoO | 2 | 0.0022 |
| #4 | Aguboo | 2 | 0.0132 |
| #5 | YuKi™(。・ω・。)ノ♡ | 1 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Woo | 189 | 0.17 | 5 min |
| #2 | YuKi™(。・ω・。)ノ♡ | 151 | 0.19 | 4 min |
| #3 | CAPoO | 117 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| #4 | Dylisious | 110 | 0.21 | 2 min |
| #5 | MK 2.2 | 48 | 0.38 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CrowRRR♡ | +4.05 | 55 | 26 |
| #2 | CAPoO | +2.93 | 84 | 56 |
| #3 | ★Rider Lyle✯ | +1.82 | 80 | 70 |
| #4 | Horuakati | +1.69 | 83 | 44 |
| #5 | YuKi™(。・ω・。)ノ♡ | +1.51 | 66 | 64 |





