








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 451 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 342 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 39 matches | ||
| Wingman | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3751 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 22,417 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6878 | 31% |
| Smokes | 6139 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 4035 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 5365 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $722,234 of utility $78 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 441 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MiNtBlAsUb | 75% | 44 |
| #2 | Vile | 68% | 41 |
| #3 | SINI♡ | 67% | 87 |
| #4 | tuulos | 66% | 35 |
| #5 | 2OLD4rölli | 65% | 26 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #12 | Nekopeek |トルネード | 59% | 54 |
| #13 | Tuuli :3 | 55% | 77 |
| #14 | S4MI | 53% | 58 |
| #15 | Sasoni | 53% | 34 |
| #16 | Tomppa | 52% | 31 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | peter griffin | 4 | 0.0063 |
| #2 | daNbee | 3 | 0.0013 |
| #3 | Wheatground | 1 | 0.0004 |
| #4 | SINI♡ | 1 | 0.0005 |
| #5 | Drip Pancakes | 1 | 0.0006 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SINI♡ | 389 | 0.20 | 11 min |
| #2 | Wheatground | 382 | 0.14 | 10 min |
| #3 | daNbee | 351 | 0.16 | 7 min |
| #4 | S4MI | 304 | 0.24 | 7 min |
| #5 | MiNtBlAsUb | 258 | 0.29 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MiNtBlAsUb | +4.08 | 89 | 70 |
| #2 | SINI♡ | +2.39 | 83 | 73 |
| #3 | Vile | +1.65 | 86 | 64 |
| #4 | tuulos | +0.50 | 68 | 64 |
| #5 | daNbee | +0.43 | 61 | 56 |





