








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 127 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 59 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 16 matches | ||
| Premier | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1569 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,783 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2247 | 33% |
| Smokes | 1049 | 15% |
| HE Grenades | 1974 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 1513 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $676,201 of utility $147 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 191 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | mark | 42% | 12 |
| #10 | Pööpötin | 36% | 14 |
| #11 | vauhtisami | 35% | 52 |
| #12 | ellaaaa | 21% | 24 |
| #13 | kyntäjä | 17% | 12 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sammee | 13 | 0.0088 |
| #2 | MYLT$I | 9 | 0.0083 |
| #3 | Miksubb | 8 | 0.0190 |
| #4 | kalmarz | 6 | 0.0088 |
| #5 | vauhtisami | 5 | 0.0048 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sammee | 216 | 0.15 | 6 min |
| #2 | MYLT$I | 140 | 0.13 | 4 min |
| #3 | 예지 | 129 | 0.17 | 4 min |
| #4 | vauhtisami | 122 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #5 | kalmarz | 74 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kalmarz | +7.81 | 92 | 58 |
| #2 | MYLT$I | +7.43 | 94 | 61 |
| #3 | Sammee | +3.68 | 92 | 56 |
| #4 | mark | +2.73 | 76 | 74 |
| #5 | vauhtisami | +1.62 | 79 | 58 |





