








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 925 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 179 matches | ||
| Wingman | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Esplay | 1 match | 1,373 | |
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 56 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




21 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1719 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,743 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 485 | 13% |
| Smokes | 1101 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 1333 | 36% |
| Molotovs | 824 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $835,651 of utility $176 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 438 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Frolle | 49% | 140 |
| #2 | javeinne | 49% | 122 |
| #3 | aggiN | 49% | 115 |
| #4 | Wingman Jesus | 44% | 111 |
| #5 | Ketamin Ken | 43% | 95 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | javeinne | 15 | 0.0058 |
| #2 | Frolle | 14 | 0.0047 |
| #3 | Wingman Jesus | 10 | 0.0043 |
| #4 | aggiN | 9 | 0.0039 |
| #5 | Ketamin Ken | 9 | 0.0046 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | aggiN | 222 | 0.10 | 5 min |
| #2 | Ketamin Ken | 143 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| #3 | Wingman Jesus | 83 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| #4 | Frolle | 76 | 0.03 | 2 min |
| #5 | javeinne | 69 | 0.03 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | javeinne | +3.57 | 55 | 40 |
| #2 | regeN | +0.53 | 47 | 36 |
| #3 | Ketamin Ken | -0.20 | 51 | 30 |
| #4 | Wingman Jesus | -0.29 | 63 | 34 |
| #5 | aggiN | -1.10 | 31 | 46 |





