








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 679 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 117 matches | ||
| Wingman | 58 matches | ||
| Esplay | 9 matches | 1,555 | |
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 23 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1350 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,959 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 596 | 20% |
| Smokes | 850 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 745 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 768 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $611,560 of utility $145 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 75 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | aggiN | 53% | 68 |
| #2 | Frolle | 47% | 94 |
| #3 | javeinne | 46% | 114 |
| #4 | regeN | 44% | 111 |
| #5 | Ketamin Ken | 33% | 52 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | aggiN | 53% | 68 |
| #2 | Frolle | 47% | 94 |
| #3 | javeinne | 46% | 114 |
| #4 | regeN | 44% | 111 |
| #5 | Ketamin Ken | 33% | 52 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | regeN | 13 | 0.0056 |
| #2 | javeinne | 13 | 0.0058 |
| #3 | Frolle | 11 | 0.0057 |
| #4 | aggiN | 4 | 0.0030 |
| #5 | Ketamin Ken | 2 | 0.0019 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | aggiN | 108 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| #2 | Ketamin Ken | 83 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #3 | regeN | 81 | 0.03 | 2 min |
| #4 | Frolle | 64 | 0.03 | 2 min |
| #5 | javeinne | 57 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | javeinne | +3.63 | 58 | 40 |
| #2 | regeN | -0.23 | 48 | 36 |
| #3 | Wingman Jesus | -0.54 | 64 | 36 |
| #4 | aggiN | -0.70 | 33 | 47 |
| #5 | Ketamin Ken | -1.30 | 51 | 29 |





