








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 346 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 89 matches | ||
| Premier | 64 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 10 matches | ||
| Wingman | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 18 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4113 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,962 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2532 | 28% |
| Smokes | 3230 | 36% |
| HE Grenades | 1926 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 1274 | 14% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,138,437 of utility $136 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 239 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gummy | 56% | 90 |
| #2 | UnHoly42 | 50% | 161 |
| #3 | 909Holland | 49% | 92 |
| #4 | T0K3NC0B | 43% | 47 |
| #5 | Pikachew | 38% | 80 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | T0K3NC0B | 43% | 47 |
| #5 | Pikachew | 38% | 80 |
| #6 | Phat Cat | 37% | 75 |
| #7 | BigOlCone | 37% | 41 |
| #8 | VuBerry | 35% | 23 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pikachew | 12 | 0.0075 |
| #2 | Phat Cat | 8 | 0.0054 |
| #3 | Gummy | 5 | 0.0029 |
| #4 | UnHoly42 | 4 | 0.0013 |
| #5 | 909Holland | 4 | 0.0023 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | UnHoly42 | 289 | 0.10 | 7 min |
| #2 | Pikachew | 236 | 0.15 | 5 min |
| #3 | 909Holland | 224 | 0.13 | 6 min |
| #4 | VuBerry | 116 | 0.24 | 3 min |
| #5 | T0K3NC0B | 107 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | VuBerry | +1.74 | 55 | 59 |
| #2 | UnHoly42 | +1.39 | 69 | 54 |
| #3 | bigjuice | +1.36 | 75 | 54 |
| #4 | Gummy | +0.04 | 52 | 31 |
| #5 | Phat Cat | -1.69 | 23 | 33 |





