








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1219 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 103 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 94 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 77 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 71 matches | ||
| Wingman | 48 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 145 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




92 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4138 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 24,218 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7918 | 33% |
| Smokes | 6983 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 4730 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 4587 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,731,614 of utility $127 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 820 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gummy | 47% | 43 |
| #2 | VuBerry | 46% | 39 |
| #3 | 909Holland | 43% | 53 |
| #4 | UnHoly42 | 43% | 294 |
| #5 | Phat Cat | 39% | 105 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Phat Cat | 39% | 105 |
| #6 | bigjuice | 38% | 80 |
| #7 | BigOlCone | 36% | 88 |
| #8 | T0K3NC0B | 35% | 51 |
| #9 | spittingcobra | 22% | 54 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | UnHoly42 | 17 | 0.0030 |
| #2 | BigOlCone | 5 | 0.0030 |
| #3 | VuBerry | 5 | 0.0071 |
| #4 | bigjuice | 4 | 0.0025 |
| #5 | Gummy | 4 | 0.0050 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | UnHoly42 | 432 | 0.08 | 10 min |
| #2 | VuBerry | 146 | 0.21 | 3 min |
| #3 | bigjuice | 118 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| #4 | 909Holland | 111 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #5 | T0K3NC0B | 87 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | UnHoly42 | +2.27 | 70 | 52 |
| #2 | VuBerry | +1.51 | 52 | 60 |
| #3 | bigjuice | +1.42 | 76 | 52 |
| #4 | Gummy | -0.08 | 59 | 33 |
| #5 | Phat Cat | -0.76 | 29 | 35 |





