








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 593 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 188 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 134 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 112 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 109 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 76 matches | ||
| Premier | 73 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 66 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 27 matches | ||
| Wingman | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 3 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 371 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




36 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5371 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,631 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1798 | 19% |
| Smokes | 2327 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 4218 | 44% |
| Molotovs | 1288 | 13% |
Our logs show you have wasted $4,681,996 of utility $248 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1423 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | property in Egypt | 51% | 72 |
| #2 | Rapier | 48% | 276 |
| #3 | slipi_playMCwithme | 47% | 85 |
| #4 | Rudnoc | 47% | 49 |
| #5 | emi >:3 | 46% | 290 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hannah | 15 | 0.0055 |
| #2 | Faye ~ ♡ :3 | 14 | 0.0026 |
| #3 | emi >:3 | 13 | 0.0022 |
| #4 | Rapier | 12 | 0.0021 |
| #5 | gabe | 9 | 0.0057 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Faye ~ ♡ :3 | 1713 | 0.32 | 38 min |
| #2 | hannah | 505 | 0.19 | 14 min |
| #3 | Rapier | 450 | 0.08 | 12 min |
| #4 | gabe | 344 | 0.22 | 7 min |
| #5 | slipi_playMCwithme | 160 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hannah | +6.10 | 84 | 57 |
| #2 | Rapier | +4.96 | 79 | 57 |
| #3 | property in Egypt | +1.48 | 59 | 45 |
| #4 | slipi_playMCwithme | +1.42 | 67 | 42 |
| #5 | Faye ~ ♡ :3 | +0.40 | 52 | 62 |





